Break the cycle

Feeling out of control? Like everyone has it figured out except you? Maybe you feel like you don’t deserve nice things, or that it’s all your fault when things go wrong.

It might be your self-esteem. Not to be confused with self-confidence; people who have low self-esteem can still have an area or areas of their lives where they feel confident and capable, but underlying that is a sense that they’re not good enough.

Low self-esteem can show up as self-criticism, not trusting our emotions or feelings, avoiding challenges for fear of failing, being hyper-sensitive to disapproval or rejection, deep feelings of anxiety and depression.

When our sense of self comes from external sources, like the opinions of others, we are at the mercy of our environment and the people in it. This is shaky ground to be operating from, putting immense amounts of trust in the opinions of others and very little, if any, in our own internal compass. This sense of conditional worth can stem from childhood experiences, however for some people, low self-esteem can be triggered after a traumatic or intense life event like losing a job or a significant relationship.

Speaking to ourselves in a critical way, negative predictions of what might happen and the behaviours that follow, internalised rules for living, and deeply rooted beliefs about ourselves that we might not be consciously aware of all keep us stuck in a negative cycle of low self-esteem. The process of breaking this cycle is identifying each of these areas and changing the pattern. As with many things, awareness is the first step.

If this is something you’d like support with overcoming, get in touch today to discuss how we can break your negative cycle of thoughts and behaviours that keep low self-esteem going.